Undeceivable - nature, zen and sliding

£10 for a meal for two?

Whilst watching TV yesterday an M&S advert came on with its 'dinner for 2 for £10' marketing campaign. Immediately, I thought that was ace. Why don't more supermarkets do that? 

The next morning we made our way to the local M&S and had a look at the dinners on offer: chicken, pizza, lasagne, salads, new potatoes, ciabatta bread for main course, profiteroles, apple crumble, fresh fruit, tiramisu for dessert, and a selection of red and white wines from Italy or Sicily. You could choose one main, one side, one dessert, and a bottle of wine all for £10! How good is that? 

We worked out that our meal was worth £18. Bargain. I love a bargain. 

Incidently we chose the fine thin crust pizza, ciabatta bread, tiramisu, and bottle of Sicilian wine that supposedly has a 'hint of tobacco'! X-factor and dinner for 2 :-)

Coolest ecommerce site

Type that into Google and my site comes up on page 3!

Haha, now there's some irony for ya.

*Zen is for idiots

Since my early 20's I've wanted to be a Zen monk. Not the kind of Zen monk that sits in a temple all day, but the kind that really knows that he knows nothing and is OK with this and lives a normal life, happy to live a normal life. As I write this, I know I'm lying: I actually want to be a superhero Zen monk, completely free from worry. And that no doubt is what is driving me far from a normal life...

But it's this very desire to obtain the unobtainable that might just make me sit down, shut up, and realise that it's all rubbish: there's nothing to see, there's nothing to change, move along.

I do a bit of music, I skate a little, I watch a bit of TV, I write little stories, I snowboard sometimes, I do some Zazen, and I wear shades when it's not really very sunny. And I write copy, credit control, do customer service, and write some textbooks/storybooks. A little bit of everything. I even pick peaches.

And I know that this is life. But I really don't know it at all.

With such a wonderful world, it's weird that hardly anyone is happy - I don't know this for sure, but I get that impression from the Turkish guy who serves me at the local grocery store, without saying a word, as he stares zombie-like at the TV he has constantly blaring out Turkish game shows. And yet it's blaringly obvious why happiness eludes us: We're constantly looking for it! The Turkish guy is always looking for it in his TV shows. And it's not there. It's in him before he switches it on, but he overlooks it to watch his game shows. And I overlook it all the time.

But why do you expect to be happy? It doesn't make any sense. We've developed to survive, not to be happy. So what's with this happiness thing? Why am I striving for that? That's just greedy.

Happiness comes and goes. There's no fixing that. Chemicals in the brain. You can encourage good stuff, but you'll never be filled with it all the time, and I'm guessing that would be quite harmful, actually. Rather than happiness, I'm striving for...wisdom. Can I pick another word to sound less like a hippy? Peanuts! I'm striving for peanuts.

And that's what I've always found cool about Zen monks. They know that happiness comes and goes. They know that this life is crazy, that essentially our minds are a mess of conflicting emotions. They know that nothing is perfect because perfection is just a word. And they're working on this central problem of existence their whole life. To understand the mind - what it is to be human - to accept it and then forget it. And that's what I want to do. 

Now the thing is, how does one do that? How does one work on understanding what it is to be human. Running away and sitting isn't going to help, is it? Well, even though a lot of people think this is running away from life, I don't think so. Have you ever tried sitting still for 45 minutes? 

But I don't want to do that. I've always liked being around people - I like the excitement of big cities. And I like working. I like doing something.

The Middle Way, is best for me. God damn it, he was right all along!

"It's all for you. They laid it out for you." Vampire Weekend, Ottoman

*I don't think for a minute that Zen is the only way to gain this kind of wisdom. But for idiots, it's an option. 

Must write new post...

to get rid of old post.

I'm thinking of getting Elbow's prize-winning album. He looked like a nice guy on the awards yesterday.

We're going to the opera next week - the Royal Opera House. I'm quite excited. I haven't been to an opera before and even though I'll be in the standing area for 3 and a half hours, it should be fascinating.

I went on my skateboard yesterday for the first time in a while, and every trick I tried ended in pain. I have a bruise on one of my toes from a failed pop-shove-it.

I've discovered how to cure my nervousness: when I get nervous, loads of adrenlin enters my body. Usually, I'd feel that rush and try and calm it down. But trying to be calm won't get rid of it. So instead of trying to be calm, I go with it, embrace the extra energy,and use it up! A side-effect of this approach is that you'll often see me jumping up and down, shaking my arms around, and making horse sounds. I think it's worth it though...

Phew, can't think of anything else to write.

Sorry.